Good things recently

Spending time with my little sister is a rare treat but always a blast. When it happens in Greece...













...well, it's AMAZING.

Love and loss

My grandmother passed away less than a week after we last saw her. She had been sick for about a year and her death was not completely unexpected, yet, it caught all of us by surprise. She was the most optimistic, {bossy}, fun-loving person you would ever meet which is why, I think, we all just kept waiting for her to get better. We didn't think she would allow this to happen to her, she had PLANS. This is a picture that Kyle took last summer before she got sick. I remember her saying, "I don't think this will be a good picture. The sun was in my face and I forgot to smile". For her, no smile = bad.


These last few days have been really weird for me. I know this would have been hard anyway but it's especially difficult because of the distance. I just keep thinking how much I wish I had spent more time with her and poor grandpa who's reported he doesn't know what to do now because she was always telling him what to do. I wish I had gotten to know her better, visited more often. I also can't help but imagine what my parents' life will be when they are my grandparents' age and need help but I would probably still be living in the States. That part is really hard.

The really odd thing about this whole experience is that I feel that all the answers to my questions are actually coming from the very person that I just lost: Head up. It's all a part of life. Enjoy what you have. Don't worry. Don't be jealous. Be kind. Eat. Drink. Sing at the top of your lungs. Dance when your knees hurt. Have opinions. Ask for help. If that doesn't work, boss people around.

Be good! Be kind! Support Sofia Pride 2010!

Most of the time, I try to keep politics out of the conversations we have here. I know we all come from such different backgrounds, that it's impossible to agree on the BIG issues: sex, politics, religion. All that being said, I also know that despite our differences, we all agree that everyone has the right to live a fulfilling life and that it's up to them to define what that means.

In less than a month, a group of 300, maybe 400 people will go out on the street in Sofia and politely ask Bulgarians to let them be. They will be supported by a small number of foreign diplomatic missions (USA, France, Germany), some local non-profits, some bigger European LGBT rights groups, a handful of bloggers. The local media will cover the event in a mostly sensationalist manner. Very few Bulgarian politicians will comment. The ones that will, will mostly make homophobic remarks and you would wish they never spoke. The Sofia mayor's office will do the bare minimum to support the event and will discourage the organizers from turning the event into a celebration. They will do a good job of providing enough cops to secure the route but they won't do much else.

So, today I ask you a favor.

Please support Sofia Pride 2010. It's only our 3rd one, so it's small. It's not going to be like anything you might have experienced in Paris, Berlin, or New York. It's definitely NOT San Francisco. But it's a lot more controversial and even more IMPORTANT. It's happening despite resistance. On the day of... it will be scary for some of the participants but they will be there because despite the grimness, there ARE people in Bulgaria who Love Equality and Support Diversity.

Currently, the organizers are still trying to raise funds to put together the best possible event they can. They need less than $4000 and we can help them meet that goal. Please make a small donation via PayPal and share this request with your friends on Facebook and Twitter. If you are planning to make a donation, please make a pledge at the bottom of this entry!

I know we are all cynical and disillusioned in many ways, but kindness, solidarity and compassion still go a long way. Be good. Be kind. HELP!

3 years

Kyle and I got married three years ago on this day. It was a small but very sweet ceremony conducted entirely in Bulgarian. My sister was translating (poorly) and Kyle knew just barely enough Bulgarian to say "I do".


I could say that it was the happiest moment of my life but the truth is, it isn't. Ever since I met Kyle, my life's been getting better and better. The man is a dream.

This Thanksgiving

I am grateful for my mom and my dad who are the sweetest, most caring and giving adults I've known in my life.

I am grateful for my little sister who is funny and smart and inspires me every day but also fills my heart with heaps of joy.

I am grateful for my American family who always remind me that home is not a place. Home is people that care.

I am grateful for friends: here, there, everywhere. Old and new. I am always amazed at how generous and gracious y'all are and how much easier the rough times are when you are around.

I am grateful for technology that helps us all stay in touch even thought we are thousands of miles apart.

I am grateful for this little life we are living: Midtown, our feather bed, our jobs, our cute house, our pots of herbs, our record player, the old film cameras we purchase on Ebay and the produce section at the local Kroger, my Borders discount card. For the first time in a long time I feel like I live HERE. This is where we are AT.

I am grateful for a wonderful Thankgiving day with Dr. J's family who are the most welcoming bunch you'll ever meet.

I am grateful for Dr. J sharing her Memphis with us.

I am grateful for finding a great recipe and making coconut-and-oats macaroons that might have just become my favorite dessert.



But most of all, I am grateful for my husband who not only had the brilliant idea to dip the macaroons in melted chocolate but also makes me feel like I am the luckiest girl in the world. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

Much love to you all!

Love

From STILL LIFE WITH A WOODPECKER
--Tim Robbins

Love is the ultimate outlaw. It just won't adhere to any rues. the most any of us an do is to sign on as its accomplice. Instead of vowing to honor and obey maybe we should swear to aid and abet. That would mean that security is out of the question. The words "make" and "stay" become inappropriate. My love for you has no strings attached. I love you for free.

via RecoverGirl

Big bursts and little bursts

Just finished reading Olive Kitteridge by Elizabeth Strout. I didn't go ga-ga over it like many people told me I would but I found Strout's treatment of middle-aged and/or elderly, middle-class couples quite fascinating. Reading Olive made me think (and worry) about marriage and aging in a way that I had never considered before. It also made me think about some of the long-term relationships I have observed in my life: my parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles. I think that when a book makes you look inward and has you guessing about your own experiences, that's a pretty good sign it's a book worth reading. Not always, but most of the time. So, I'm happy I read Olive even though I didn't particularly enjoy the process of reading it. I will leave you with a passage that really struck a chord with me:

Olive's private view is that life depends on what she thinks of as "big bursts" and "little bursts". Big bursts are things like marriage or children, intimacies that keep you afloat, but these big bursts hold dangerous, unseen currents. Which is why you need the little bursts as well: a friendly clerk at Bradlee's, let's say, or the waitress at Dunkin' Donuts who knows how you life your coffee. Tricky business.

YES.

A love story

I saw this at Jo's blog and it made me so incredibly sad in the way that beautiful love stories always do.



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